Movie Review: Carlie and the Chocolate Factory

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Tim Burton has his moments. Though he took this film into dark arenas that just never seemed to be there in the book. Yes, the children were turned into blueberries and digitized to the size of a Ken doll. That's pretty murky concepts for kid lit. This version just creeped me out.

As Willy Wonka, Johnny Depp smarms to the children, 'Everything in here is eatable. Even the people. That's called cannibalism.' Uh.... (btw that's a vague recollection of the quote, don't shoot me if I got it slightly wrong. ) So I guess this film is about a creepy guy in a creepy candy factory. That just wasn't the impression I got when my fourth grade teacher read it to us. Back then, it thrilled and charmed.

Bandon, Coos Bay, Myrtle Point and North Bend all have copies for those of you determined to see it. Please screen it yourself before subjecting your kids to this weirdness.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0367594/
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Guest Movie Review: Pan's Labyrinth

Pan's Labyrinth

Guest post by Murry

Directed and written by Guillermo del Toro this film is set in World War II era Spain. It's IMDB title (El Laberinto del Fauno" literally: The Labyrinth of the Faun) leads you to the awareness this is a Spanish language film.

The story follows Ofelia (Ivana Baquero) as she and her mother accompany her fascist military stepfather to the forest where he hunts for rebels. An entrancing insect like faerie leads Ofelia to an entrance to a labyrinth. Once inside, she encounters weird creatures. The Faun begins to counsel her on how to solve the labyrinth as she seeks an escape from the real monster, her callous and vain stepfather.

Watch the start of the film closely. You'll see a tale of a princess who was lost from the underworld. Ofelia lays at the center of the labyrinth next to a seemingly bottomless pit, blood running from her nose. The blood runs backwards, and you wonder how
did she get there? What kind of magic is this?

Dark magic to be sure. Disturbing and violent scenes illustrate the stepfather's sinister side. This film gives an interesting portrayal of life under the fascists.

if you can understand Spanish, or don't have trouble with subtitles, take the time to see this Gem.

Plenty of copies in the library system. Look in Coos Bay, North Bend, Bandon and Myrtle Point.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0457430/

Buy it on Amazon
Pan's Labyrinth

PS: I did edit Murry's review by putting in a few actors names and the like. Since I just can't do subtitles I didn't see the film. Please alert me to any errors I might have created while making a couple changes.
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Movie Review: Captain Blood

Captain Blood

Errol Flynn sure was a pretty boy. Almost as pretty as his co-star Olivia de Havilland. Do listen to the bonus features of an interview at the premier. While i enjoyed the film, the bonuses make it even more interesting.

Blood starts his life as a physician who treats men opposing King James and is arrested and treated as an enemy. He and the men he's with escape from prison just as Spanish ships arrive to capture the colony. Blood and his crew steal an attacking ship and become cooperative pirates. Each man gets a share of the plunder.

For the age, this film holds up beaitufully. Look in Myrtle Point for the DVD and Coos Bay for the VHS.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0026174/
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Mockumentary Review: Chalk

Chalk

This film might appeal to someone. I knew they were kidding around about awful beginner teachers, but I just didn't relate. Maybe if the characters felt real and then funny stuff happened in the course of the reality. I just kept thinking, so what.

I think we all could come up with stories of bad or stupid teachers. They don't have to be at the beginning of their career to corrupt young minds. Suprise, I was a strange kid. (no really) I got together with my friend Amy in World Lit class and sang Tom Lehrer's Oedipus Rex in front of the whole class. I made holiday cards for my teachers at the same time we were reading Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. So I gave that teacher two cards, One with a green faced angel. (one real one too, I just thought the green one was funny)

My high school antics are way funnier than this lame mocumentary. Wanna see some torturous teaching? Look in Bandon.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0758738/
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Movie Review: Bringing Down the House

Bringing Down the House

Steve Martin, Queen Latifah and Eugene Levy try valiantly to save this turkey, but alas, they just don't make it. Lots of stereotypes and "ethnic" humor that tends to turn me off. Heck I think Martin's lonely white guy didn't even move past a superficial glossing.

I love the internet. I met my husband online. As is typical of Hollywood they don't understand the way things work. Anyone with half a brain knows you don't meet people at your house. Ah well.

Find something else to check out. Look for the DVD in Lakeside, Coquille and North Bend and one VHS copy in Dora.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0305669/
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Movie Review: All the Kings Men

All the Kings Men

Based on Robert Penn Warren's novel, this film tells the story of a rabble rousing politician who rises up the poor vote and gets himself elected governor of Louisiana. Warren based his novel on the real life of Huey Long, the charismatic depression era power house of southern politics.

Sean Penn transforms himself from a humble mayor into a man of the people. Jude Law plays his conscious. Law's character shines a light on all the dark corners his boss wants exposed. Sometimes even holding up a mirror to his own and his employers actions.

Watch the Bons Features. Though they repeat quite a bit of the film, it's really interesting how they draw the parallels between he real and fictional governors.

Look for the outstanding performances of Anthony Hopkins, Kate Winslet, and James Gandolfini.

Find this fine film in Bandon.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0405676/

Buy it on Amazon
All the King's Men (Special Edition)

Download it from Amazon (Better to buy IMHO)
All the King's Men

Movie Review: Pursuit of Happiness

Pursuit of Happiness

I have mixed feelings about this Will Smith film. Though well acted and interesting story, I come away with some concerns about the values of the real person the story is about. Chris Gardner disappointed me.

He's got a lot of chutzpah, I'll give him that. At the start of the film he's a struggling salesman trying to sell a bone density scanner that isn't quite the money maker he hoped it would be. While walking around downtown San Fransisco he happens upon a guy in a fancy sports car and asks how he got that. The guy is a stock broker and Gardner decides to figure out how to be one too.

I don't have a problem with someone wanting to get ahead, be rich even. It just he ends up in shelters with his son and instead of getting a job he takes an unpaid position interning at a brokerage firm. He sells the last of his bone density machines. to make it through the program.

Is it really the pursuit of happiness or the pursuit of wealth? Happiness is when you sleep in your own bed at night and don't stress as you fall asleep. I give credit that Gardner makes it after all his trials. I just worry that he comes close to abusing his son in the process. I worry that he forgot his primary duty, to have a safe place for his child.

Since this brought up some deep emotion, it makes for a really compelling film. See for yourself. Bandon, Coos Bay, Coquille, Dora and Powers all have copies.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0454921/
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Movie Review: Changing Hearts

Changing Hearts

I'm not against sad stories if they're good and heartfelt. This one depressed and confused me. I don't really care about these people and the acting coulda been phoned in from another country. Maybe the play is better.

Lauren Holly and Faye Dunaway can do a good job, I guess someone just depressed them so much they lost their will to entertain. They're patients at a cancer hospital next door to a cemetery. If you ask me, that's a crappy place for burial plots.

If you must see it, look in Bandon.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0303860/
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Documentary Review: Amandla! A Revolution in Four Part Harmony

Amandla!
A Revolution in Four Part Harmony

During Apartheid blacks in South Africa were forbidden from protesting so they made up songs with mystery lyrics. Music became the underground railroad. Like in the America slave movement, quilts lead the way to freedom, in Africa songs paved the way.

I really like how you learn stuff without sitting through a boring documentary. People's moving stories come through the music. It's a nice way to learn.

Look in Bandon's wonderful collection for this haunting DVD

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0303297/
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Movie Review Cheaper by the Dozen 1 and 2

Cheaper by the Dozen

I'd really like to see the old one from the 40s but the copies the library has are missing or damaged. That's a real shame, because I really liked the second one of those.

These Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt semi stinkers left me wondering what people are thinking. Yep, life is about choices and if you choose to have a big family, you choose to deal with the consequences of it. I grew up watching my friend Jessie's chaotic home life. Her mother had seven of her own and married a guy with five.

None of the chaos in the film felt authentic. It was all "move made up." Now I can cope with that if it'd entertained, but it was just a big yawn fest. I like Bonnie Hunt, I think she's pretty and interesting, but I just don't believe her when she plays someone. Ever. Sad really. I want to.

Library: Dora, Myrtle Point, Bandon, North Bend

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0349205/

Cheaper by the Dozen 2

Lets take the first film and send everyone to a lake. Though it was better than the first with Eugene Levy added to the cast, it still didn't rise into a worthwhile use of your time.

Martin and his brood compete against a rich stuck up guy who treats his kids like toy soldiers. He expects them to do well in everything and be what he wants, Baron Von Trapp in a track suite.

Library: Coos Bay, Myrtle Point and Lakeside

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0452598/
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Movie Review: Children of Men

Children of Men

In the future women stop making babies and Britain becomes a closed society that despises all people from other nations. Julianne Moore heads a terrorist organization who needs to move a girl around a heavily regulated and violent country. She enlists her former lover to get her documents and it all goes weird from there.

The youngest person in the world, who's 18 dies at the start of the film. This scary future made me think a lot about our place on the planet. It isn't ever really explained why no babies are being born or why there aren't alternatives. Science and technology survive, but people turn animalistic and closed down. It really doesn't explain that either.

They mention a pandemic, but it's all kind of vague. I would think that if there were no new people coming along a country would be happy to have newcomers. People are blowing things up, it seems without purpose. The bonus features were all about politics and philosophy of the possible real futures, but they did little to explain the holes.

All that confusion aside, the story moves along nice, the acting is top notch and it's well worth your time. Lots of violence with stuff blowing up and shooting. Look in Dora, Lakeside, Coos Bay, Myrtle Point or Bandon for this DVD.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0206634/
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I did so good in March

Yes, I flaked and no review for today. I'll do two over the weekend. Sorry folks.

Anime Review: The Cat Returns

The Cat Returns

Yay a movie all about kitties. Haru, a human girl saves the life of a cat who turns out to be the prince of a magic land ruled by cats. The king decides to make her his daughter-in-law and brings her to his castle. While there she begins to turn into a cat.

She gets help from the Cat Bureau, a mysterious organization run by a cat figurine and his helper a huge white feline, and a crow. We got action, we got adventure and we got KITTIES!

Anne Hathaway leads a wonderful cast of voice acting. Cary Elwes, Peter Boyle, and Elliott Gould voice the Cat Bureau deinzens. Watch the bonus features too.

Definitely worth a couple hours and family friendly. Look in Bandon for the only DVD copy.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0347618/
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Movie Review: Charlie's Angles 1 and 2

Charlie's Angles

Lucy Liu can't bake. It amused me that the girls called what she made "Chinese fighting muffins, " but the story bit so badly after that, I just sat and thought about something else. Why women who are powerful and smart have to do stuff for men is beyond me. These girls swoon over a guy they've never met and cry when they get dissed.

The plot reminds me of an episode of the series i.e. forgettable drivel. So many more options for action adventure. Pick something less sexist and whiny.

Library: Bandon, Dora, Powers and Coos Bay

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0160127/

Charlie's Angels, Full Throttle.

Again we have Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore, and Lucy Liu as a trio of detective kick ass beauties who solve crime for a mysterious boss man. Could we get any more offensive than them "under cover" dancing around slapping their ass. Please gag me.

Oh yea, there's a plot that who cares. I didn't. I just skimmed through it. I wanted to full throttle these girls and the writer of this piece of trash.

Call me lazy, the first one might be ok here and there, but #2 definitely is a dog. I decided to just do one review post and call them both soso.

Library: Myrtle Point

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0305357/
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Movie Review: Chicken Little

Chicken Little

The only bright spot in this film comes at the end when there's a Chicken Little film within this one. The voicing by Adam West and others during that scene just made me laugh. Sadly, that's NOT the time to start the fun.

Chicken Little and his band of misfit friends discover some aliens they believe to be invading the world. This is scary and I would think not fun AT ALL for kids. The pointless meandering plot failed to show me anything to care about. It really chaps my hide when "aliens" are either cute and lovable benign creatures or scary monsters. This plot managed both and badly at that.

Murry remarked that it really shows in some of these animated films that the voice actors are not interacting during the film. They just watch the video and record their voice in a vacuum. They often never meet until the press tour after the film. It makes their performances wooden and dry.

Come on Disney/Pixar. Don't be scaring kids and breakin my kid like heart. Coquille, Myrtle Point and Bandon have copies of the DVD.

IMDB http://imdb.com/title/tt0371606/
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